I am the absolute worst when it comes to answering my phone. I do no enjoy pointless conversations-I reserve those for texting. As of late I find myself watching an individual call then my countenance changes and I start contemplating if I should answer or not. I am not speaking of the pesky unavailable calls or bill collectors, I am referencing those that you have labeled as a friend but have some qualms about them.
I did not realize how many of these people had infiltrated my life. Prior to this season I had people that I loved to speak with. We laughed, talked for hours and spent quality time together. Then something shifted and I was left with a gaping hole in my heart. I trusted these people. Some were family but nevertheless they came to a consensus that me being a part of their life was too much for them to handle. This was a hard pill to swallow. I was blindsided and left with no explanation. I had to do some soul searching.
One day I had a conversation about my favorite food: Shrimp. I’m a true “Bubba Gump” at heart. I was raving about the latest place that I had labeled as my favorite spot to eat. While speaking to an old friend he politely let me finish and he stated “Those are BOTTOM FEEDERS. They are no good for you. They eat anything that is left over at the bottom of the sea and they are content with it. Eating shrimp is terrible for your digestive track” I instantly got angry. I LOVED SHRIMP! Now I was faced with the reality that something that I loved so much was toxic for me. Out of my respect for his plethora of wisdom and knowledge I stopped eating shrimp cold turkey.
Then the epiphany came. The individuals that were no longer a part of my life were just like those shrimp. They were bottom feeders. I enjoyed their company and gave them all of me while they knew that they were there only for a limited time. They came to feed off of my scraps and the manifestation that they received was not the same as I. They couldn’t accept it and so they had to float off to another part of the sea.
Now I have new people in my life. People that I have no idea what their motives are and why they are present. Still wounded from the last group of Decapoda I am now faced with the task of sifting through ambivalence. Watching a clip from Vanessa Van Edwards as she spoke on Impact Theory with Tom Bilyeu opened my eye to an entirely new theory. The anxiety that comes from dealing with ‘fake friends’ is literally bad for your health.
So as I now substitute my shrimp for tilapia I have also traded what I once thought were lifelong relationships for new budding connections that seemingly may be the best thing that ever happened to me or may end up at the bottom of the sea.
To see the full episode of Vanessa Van Edwards speaking on ‘Fake Friends’ Click on the link:
http://impacttheory.com/episode/vanessa-van-Edwards/